The Milestone Called 80

Celebrating my 80th birthday at Les Fougères in Chelsea. Note the “heart sparkle” dancing near my face!

I recently passed my 80th birthday. A milestone.  And, on that special day, something inside of me clicked, viscerally. What was still being somewhat experienced as an intellectual ideology that I am a spiritual being expressing into a physical reality by way of my physiology, became a full visceral truth, no longer denied out of the convenience of always having wanted to fit in at any cost. I trust that most women reading this know what I am talking about.

Time is my signature currency for being on planet earth these days. I am done frittering my time on engagements that all feel, smell, sound and look the same - yet promising something different - ultimately coughing up the same undigested results that chronically fostered disillusionment, disappointment and distrust.

I recognize the trance of Self sabotage. Like it or not, we have been well educated to fall into this trance - camouflaged in diverse ways - as decoys to ignore, deny, and defend against all the things we don’t like about ourselves and would rather not know. We argue for what is right so that we won’t have to fall into the proverbial trap of believing we are wrong… about anything and everything.

Even awakened, we can still find ourselves saying Yes, when we mean No… AND No when we mean Yes. Anything to save face and keep the peace… defaulting to the same strategies that beget the same results we have always known, because we believe that we are not enough.

Not Enough is a convenient, yet deadly, driver to stay small and in misery of an untruth.

Think about it. Let THAT rumble through your body. And take a long healing breath to digest and metabolize THAT. Your willingness to feel that discomfort could actually become the ruin of everything you have known as pain. It takes getting very clear about your own personal boundaries in support of what gets a YES in your life and what gets a NO in your life. it demands staying aware.

I promise you that none of the above is as far fetched as you might think. If you want to know more, I encourage you to connect with me here.

I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you for reading.